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cloudy, like your head

by normal state

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1.
you planted wild yellow flowers in your garden one day and watched the summer heat turn it all to flames // and they wanted you to so badly pick them a bouquet but the fire was spreading you said its too late now, but I will be back one day, someday // it's cloudy like your head and you don't want to go outside everybody's pushing pills, but you're already high // it won't make you happy just 'cause it won't make you sad you don't need the answers to the questions that you ask get out of your body it is only going to hurt if you keep on trying, one day you can leave the earth // I'm here to clear my head my friends are dead I didn't like them anyway //
2.
cactus guts 02:50
you are in need of something quick and cheap to cover up the blue we are 500 miles away but I am sitting in your room I love the torture of the movie I keep watching in my head but that is not reality those characters are dead // I still sleep with the lights on I still check under my bed regression is my only method of self defense I'm scared of the dark knowing everyone else in this time zone is unconscious except for us //
3.
forsythia 02:24
objectified, i was your piece of art to stare at and critique puzzled look, squinted eyes trying to find the ways in which it won't comply // so I went as far away from home as I could go but you won't leave me alone you won't //
4.
5.
accidents 03:30
it's hard to structure sentences it's harder once you've got it down and practiced it, it's harder just to say it // it's easy to smile when you have to around people it's easier to walk away when you realize it's never going to be okay // so you ask your friends, what do you think? they say do what makes you happy so you drove all day and you drove all night to see if maybe you might be somewhere else // hands touching hands passing cigarettes it’s all probably all just an accident // so you ask your friends, what do you think? they ask you if you're happy you tell them maybe you might be from somewhere else it's all probably all just an accident //
6.
I've been living in a lot of places I don't ever want to find a home I've been seeing familiar faces reconstructed with a different ego we can talk about the changing weather if I ask to use your lighter, can we smoke together?
7.
relics 05:29
memories last as long as the relics you keep attached until they fall out of your pocket and are forgotten like my name carved in wood, hidden in a crevice a forgotten passenger you did not notice that watched you cry as you drove away the only souvenir to hold my name // did you throw it away? did you throw me away? // I still have your favorite sweater in my car it's getting colder, you might need it where you are I've gotten better it's just been so fucking hard if you're listening, I wish you weren't so far

credits

released October 15, 2016

<3 covelline blue

recorded in buffalo, ny & somd

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all rights reserved

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about

normal state Golden Beach, Maryland

hi, i’m cove (they/them). welcome! i hope u find something here that makes u feel something. thanks a lot for stoppin by. god bless y’all real good <3

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